Sunday, June 22, 2008

Second-Guessing Myself?

Should we stay with Vietnam and hope for a miracle? Should we switch to Ethiopia right away and risk not getting a free renewal? Should we go with a domestic adoption; most likely a transracial adoption? Or even should we try infertility treatments? (We know we are, but we never underwent any fertility treatments) and at just about 40years of age, should I and do I really want to be pregnant? Where is this coming from?? Well, in the past month(s), there have been so many other prospective adoptive parents that have either become pregnant (I don't think I can name overyone, but congratulations to all of you and several who have adopted domestically (congratulation to the latest new parents, Megan and Larry)

11 comments:

abc123vn said...

Wow - good luck with all of the decisions...we are here for you!

Laura said...

I know this isn't an easy decision. Ultimately, you'll do what's right for your family. I'm sorry your in this position and will be thinking of you as you figure out what to do.

Anonymous said...

I know whatever you decide will be the right choice and you will be a mommy soon.
Diane Castellon

Melissa said...

Kathryn and Kevin - this is tough. These decision are heart wrenching as you desire to be parents NOW. Know that you have the answer within yourselves and it will be the right one. Pray! God will guide you in the right direction - always!

Melissa

fiveinthehive said...

So many tough decisions. I hope your path will be made clear soon.

Ann said...

I hope you figure it all out with no regrets, we endured 5yrs of infertility treatements,,looking back now the biggest mistake emotionally and financially we could of ever done.

M&M Nichols said...

Wow, reading your thoughts was like a verse from my own head! We are on the list for Vietnam and trying hard to hold out hope that the adoptions continue. Until then, I just remind myself that it is a leap of faith and a path over which I have no control. So, from one blogger to another, I feel your pain!

Jessica and Eddie said...

I second guess myself daily and I wish that I didnt. I do have faith that God is with us down this path. I know my problem is being patient. You would think by now-patience would be one thing that I do have.

susan & charles said...

Oh, Kathryn. I've been in your shoes. We endured many years of fertility treatments, we were in the Vietnam program, and have now switched to Ethiopia. I feel real peace about our decision. So from someone who has been there: Just follow your heart - not your head and trust God to make His will known.

Amanda & Andrew said...

This is a difficult decision and one that must be made by you and your husband. The only thing I can say is that it has to FEEL right.

We made our decision last April and when faced with switching our program (after our first agency failed us), we found that the most important part of the whole thing was that our children indeed be from Ethiopia.

Sometimes it takes a situation like this, a crossroads, to really bring up feelings you didn't know you had.

Perhaps think on it, relax and weigh your options....any feelings you may have-consider them. Do not dismiss a bad feeling or whatnot.

Good luck and we're all here hoping this decision will be one that you will make when the time is right. :)

Meg DeZutti said...

Kathryn -- we have pondered every question you just posted. Seriously. Sometimes Gregg thinks we "gave up" too early on getting pregnant. But in the end, we just want to be parents, I just want to be a mom, and it doesn't matter how that happens. Rather than spend $$$ on the "maybe" of fertility treatments, we decided to parent a child already in the world who doesn't have parents/ or parents able to do the job. If by some weird chance we end up pregnant without medical intervention, that's fine, but in the meantime, we are meant to be the parents of an orphan in ETH. Don't know if any of this helps.